8 Unexpected Benefits of Breastfeeding

Though it is the biologically normal way to feed a baby not every one is sure about breastfeeding.  The beauty of breastfeeding is often touted to encourage moms to give it a try because if they knew how amazing it is even the most unsure would at least think about breastfeeding.  Everything from health benefits to ease of use, breastfeeding is praised for the dream infant nutrition system it is.  These are good things and we should promote them but over the years I’ve discovered a few, shall we say unexpected benefits of breastfeeding?  Sure, it’s great that breastmilk can do things like reduce a woman’s chance of breast cancer, boost a little baby’s immune system, and even have stem cells in it but I bet you didn’t know breastfeeding can be an orgasm alert!  Oh yeah, there are some seriously good unexpected benefits from something so normal as breastfeeding.  I’m going to do my part in encouraging women to give breastfeeding a go with 8 Unexpected Benefits of Breastfeeding.
 

1.  The best excuse to sit around
Don’t feel like making dinner? Gotta feed the baby!  For the last 10 months I’ve made breakfast maybe a dozen times all because Smunchie needs her breakfast too and the next thing I know The Piano Man has coffee and either eggs and toast (or a frittata, yum) or pancakes going.  Oh darn, sorry sweetie, I was planning on getting that started just as soon as I could.  I was stuck on the couch feeding a poor, helpless little baby!

2.  Escape plan A 
Trapped in a conversation with someone you want to get away from?  Oh dear, baby’s hungry!  I don’t believe women need to worry about being discreet about breastfeeding in public but if one suddenly feels modest and needs to go sit some place quiet to nurse nobody will blame you and you can get away from the uncomfortable conversation with Whatshername Won’tstoptalking.

3.  The kitchen fall back plan
Making pancakes but ran out of milk?  No worries!  And if you don’t tell anybody they may all wonder what you did different that made your flapjacks so much more yummy.  Don’t tell them until after they’re done though, seems even children that grew on your milk before can become squeamish at the idea years later.  And hubs won’t know if it’s the creamer in his coffee either.

4.  Bigger B@@bs!
It’s true a woman’s breasts usually increases in size during pregnancy and remains that way or bigger while lactating.  You may not have ever cared if you got bigger boobs but it is still interesting to see them change, never a dull moment!

5.  BUSTin’ at the seams = SHOPPING!  
Legit reason to go shopping, nothing fits right!  Those bigger boobies need to be comfortable and showcased properly, get the attire to do it in style.  Time to hit the racks or the online boutiques and buy yourself some stylish wear to dress the ladies in and it’s totally real, you actually do NEED new clothes you can nurse in!

6.  Weapons of mass destruction 
Make me mad?  Yeah, I wouldn’t do that, I could whip one of these full C-cup babies out and with a little squeeze blow you to smithereens.  Or at least get you wet and sticky.  Don’t put it past me either, you never know what will set me off.

7.   Double Alarm- well, hello Big O. 
Your partner not sure when you’ve have an orgasm?  You’ll boost his confidence when you come with a double set of sprinklers spraying all over the place.  Many women experience milk spray from their lactating breasts when the orgasm.  Don’t let it rain on your parade, enjoy the new twist on doing the deed!

8.  Cure-all in a cute package 
Baby got a blocked tear duct?  Squirt a little breastmilk in her eye.  Diaper rash?  A breastmilk rinse and then some naked time will clear that up in no time if it’s not a yeast based rash.  Cut?  Ready, aim, squirt!  You guessed it, a little spray of breastmilk on the area and watch it heal in record time.  From acne to ear infections, breastmilk has amazing healing properties!  People, it has stem cells in it, breastmilk is the stuff modern medicine wants to be when it grows up!  And for more amazing health science on breastmilk try googling HAMLET (all caps) and breastmilk.  Prepared to be wow’d.

9.  Facebook/Twitter/Blog/Surfing time
I admit it, most of the time when I’m on some social media networking site I probably have a baby attached and if I’m lucky and she’s really hungry I can stretch it long enough to get caught up on all the people I follow or even write a blog post.  It’s called NAK (Nursing At the Keyboard) but it could also be called NeTCFToN (Need To Check Facebook Time to Nurse) because how else would I find the time?  A Leaky’s got to do what a Leaky’s got to do.  (Are you a Leaky?  Go like our Facebook page and join the fun!)

Oh rats, that was 9.  Now it sounds like I just couldn’t come up with one more for a nice round 10.  Oh well.

Not only have my boobies given me healthy babies they’ve also healed rashes, bought me time to sit, and given me an excuse to shop for new clothes.  There is a lot of wonderful stuff about breastfeeding and I’m a fan but even I don’t love every second of every breastfeeding session.  I tell you what though, I sure do love The Piano Man making me breakfast while I get my Tweet on.

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Comments

  1. LMAO @ "Whatshername Won'tstoptalking"

  2. love love love these and yes I have used them all. I always say I nurse because I am lazy. I am a lazy environmentalist and AP mom! Its all about convenience, you never forget a boob! and yes I have used my boobs as milk guns!

  3. MommaBear says:

    I love it! Theses are so true πŸ™‚

  4. I'm TOTALLY looking forward to #2 since my in-laws seem to be obnoxiously opinionated. And I'm sure they're going to have nasty and inappropriate comments about bf itself. So it will be nice to have to "excuse myself" during family functions – whether baby has to bf or not!

  5. Anonymous says:

    So true! Im always cutting out of conversations with my Cat Lady neighbor by telling her I have to go feed Julian. Theres also a benefit for husbands..or atleast mine, which usually occurs on Sunday when hes glued to the TV watching football. Anytime Julian starts fussing hes like here, I think hes hungry haha. Knowing im the only one who can feed him!

    • My husband does this all the time! I come back with “can you please make our dinner then.” πŸ™‚

  6. LOL I have used all nine πŸ™‚ Love sitting on the couch feeding the baby and hubs cooks LOL πŸ™‚ I also get to sit here and read amazing blogs, play on my farmville farm and just generally play on the computer while my little guy nurses himself to sleep.. of course if I get up he wakes up so I need to stay here and let him get his nap LOL πŸ™‚ YAY!!

  7. Regi:Create says:

    Where can I find the "milk on tap" shirt??! Awesomeness!

  8. The shirt is from PaperMama, you can click the PaperMama graphic on the right to get to her shop and order one for yourself. You can't see it but Smunchie's shirt says "I get mine straight from the tap" and is also from PaperMama.

  9. 10. Getting fun and humorous advice from an amazing group of online leakies.

    Thanks, TLB!!

  10. madasaspoon says:

    10. It's an eye make up remover, facial cleanser and anti ageing product all in one

    11. It gets rid of warts and helps stop chicken pox itching.

    12. They say there's no cure for the common cold. Wrong! Can be put in nose and ears as well as swallowed. And its the best sore throat remedy I've ever tried, bar none.

    There ya go, a nice round dozen!

  11. mamapoekie says:

    seriously, you can squeeze out enough to make pancakes?
    ANd never had sprinklers either…
    And yes, I agree that your friends might get TMI… But what the heck

  12. I have so much supply, I hand expressed easily 2oz in less than 5 minutes the other day. It's kind of crazy. This why I'm a donor, so much milk.

  13. I loved this post… Seriously… And really on the sore throat thing? My voice is kind of messed up right now from a cold… And that got me kind of curious… But IDK I still have this weird “but breastmilk is icky” thing even though I’ve been EBFing for 6 months LOL

  14. LOL! This post is making me feel so good about bf and my b@@bs I can feel a let down!

    (I never got spraying, or maybe I wasn’t looking cos there sure were puddles afterwards!)

  15. LMAO! These are awesome!! And yes, I’ve been known to use my girls as weapons… My poor husband knows better that to annoy me when I’m topless πŸ˜‰

  16. Kayleigh May says:

    I love these, I’m busy typing my blog about benifits of breastfeeding I’m going to like this to my blog so others can see the best benefits of breast feeding
    πŸ™‚
    -Kayleigh -May
    (All Things That Grow Photography)

  17. i want the shirt too, but can’t find it in her shop.

  18. #10 could also be the excuse to sleep in on the weekends/holidays. I tell my hubby “I’ve been up ALL night nursing him, let me get some sleep” so he takes the baby out and plays with him while I sleep in for a couple of hours πŸ™‚

  19. The Best Line:
    “… it has stem cells in it, breastmilk is the stuff modern medicine wants to be when it grows up!”

    I nursed for almost a decade… sure would be nice to relactate to have some of those stem cells handy for healing!

  20. #10 should be that you get to eat more often and blame the baby. πŸ™‚ haha

  21. My SO and I were joking about one of these fabulous benefits. “got a scraped knee? Squirt some boob juice on it”. He has been amazed at what BM can do!

    Also, another benefit, saving tons of money! I haven’t spent a cent on formula or feeding supplies. (we were given some bottles and liners).

  22. It’s so true. I don’t think I’ve made dinner once in the 8 weeks since the Babe was born. Love it!

    • i haven’t made dinner in 3 years – since dd 3year old was born – i had c-section and bf to keep me outta the kitchen – dd now calls it daddy’s room’

  23. #4 backfired for me–I was already big boobied!! Went from a 32DD to a 36I while nursing. No thanks!! πŸ™‚

    • You and me, Liz. I’m at 36GG and holding, a year after having my daughter.

      My perk was huge weigh loss while still eating everything. It was amazing during the holidays. I’m hoping it holds out this year. I use breastmilk as a panacea. I feel like the father in My Big Fat Greek Wedding and his windex. It gave us a great anecdote, to boot: my daughter’s first word was boob.

    • noura silvis says:

      Don’t feel bad, I went from a 38D to a 36K, and am still there a year after weaning…makes me wonder if I have another baby, will I end up a Q cup? ;…( don’t think I could handle that.

    • Right there with you…went from a DD to a …….I really don’t know because I haven’t talked myself into spending $40.00+ for one bra. Still squeezing myself into the DDD I bought when PG. Was hoping they would go down some when ds was not taking in as much milk, but 18 months later and still dealing with a severe case of muffin top. :’-(

  24. This is a great post. I use all these too!

  25. Seriously, these are awesome. I’m pregnant with my second and I am totally using it as kitchen back-up this time, just for fun. My mom kept telling me it’s great in coffee but I never tried it! I will this time. And I’ll make my mom some pancakes. She will get a kick out of that!

    But my favorite unexpected benefit is the magic cure for toddler tantrums. Terrible twos? Heck no. It’s like a sedation drug. Stop tantruming instantly. I whip out the boob, and no matter how upset my daughter is, it’s like her mouth is irresistibly, magnetically attracted to my chest. Tears and screaming stop immediately. She’s 3.5 and I have no supply now (pregnant, ya know!), and it STILL works!

  26. #’s 3 & 6 had me ROTHLMbuttO.
    Great blog!!!

  27. Definitely am not into this post. Way to use breastfeeding as an excuse to get out of anything. It has gone from the natural way to feed our children to this huge “lifestyle”. I’m sorry but putting breast milk in pancakes? That is disgusting. It’s what’s best for your baby but you don’t take the time to properly feed the rest of your family? I would love to ignore this site as I’m not interested, but it’s hard to when your facebook followers are plastering it all over my page. BFing is what is right and what is natural, but even I find it offensive how a lot of you make such a big deal about it, it has gone from nurishment to a superiority amongst mothers. Just feed your baby and get over it, it’s not that big of a deal. And I no longer use my boobs as weapons, my husband threatened to pee on me, and he was dead serious.

    • “it has gone from nurishment to a superiority amongst mothers.” Um, how did you get any of that from this post?

      Just so you know, this was supposed to be funny. You know, like, to laugh, lighten up, have fun… you should try it some time. ~Jessica

      • Katie Ellis says:

        I don’t understand how drinking a humans milk is so disgusting, but drinking milk from a dirty farm animal is so natural for people. Makes no sense. Human milk is for humans. Cow milk is for cows….. Sure its for babies, but if you’re going to drink cows milk, what’s the big deal?
        Some people have no sense of humor…. TLB is all about breast feeding awareness, not trying to be superior to anybody. A lot of people don’t know the benefits, and think its so inconvenient to do, so its a good thing to have sites like this! If you don’t like it, ignore it. Get over yourself.

    • Maxine Eriksen-Miller says:

      How strange… I don’t know about anyone else, but if there is page that offends me, or i don’t like, i honestly don’t take the time out to read or look at it, and i don’t have it plastered all over m,y FB wall (it is called ‘Block’) And i certainly don’t take the time to write on the offensive pages how offensive i feel they are… Personally, if my husband threatened to pee on me, i would be pretty offended…

  28. Love this! Also, mosquito bites! Stops the itch instantly and heals the bite in a day! Also, my natural sleepy pill! I had to take meds to make me fall aslepp before I had my nursling! Now, I just get the oxytocin flowing and I’m out πŸ™‚

  29. kimberly fachetti says:

    LOVE IT!!! LOL. I have done all of the above except the pancakes. Thinking may have to give it a try. Also have used the girls as weapons. Great way to break up a bickering session with the other kids. Don’t think they’ve ever stopped so fast. Roflmao

  30. Maxine Eriksen-Miller says:

    Number one also goes for Lunch and dinner! Answering eh door, retrieving the lost toy for the older child, requesting cups of tea… the list goes on! Love it!

  31. Brianna Jolley says:

    This really made my day. I’m expecting my second daughter in june , and TLB has really helped me with my concerns with breast feeding. I only made it to two months ebfing with my first , and I really want to make it at least to a year. Just hearing all the supportive stories and jokes is making it easier to see that my goal is in reach. This blog had me and my fiance laughing . Thank you Jessica and TLB!

  32. Elizabeth says:

    As a deep DEEP introvert, #2 is my favorite. It is the best excuse ever to escape all the bustle and noise of any large gathering for a few minutes. Feed the baby, recharge my social batteries a bit with some quiet and solitude, go back out and we’re both good for another hour or two. I don’t know what I’m going to do when I need to escape for a few minutes once I’m out of nurslings, guess I’ll go back to the old standby LONG bathroom visit.