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Breast Cancer, Because Reduced Risk Does Not Mean No Risk

October 14, 2011 by

by Terry Arnold

Editor’s note: Breastfeeding activists, such as myself, excitedly share the information that the relative risk of breast cancer decreases by 4.3% for every 12 months a woman breastfeeds (you can read the abstract from the 2002 study here).  This is exciting information and something that should be shared but not to the exclusion of the reality that a reduced risk does not mean no risk.  Women, your health is important.  Breastfeeding can be one way to reduce your risk of breast cancer but it is not a guarantee.  Please take the time to be educated and informed and then for you, for your children and for the people that love you, learn the signs of the different types of breast cancer and don’t neglect your breast health.  This article by a beautiful friend of mine, Inflammatory Breast cancer survivor, science teacher (she’s taught my kids!), and mother of 5 breastfed children is one of the most important articles I’ve ever shared here on theleakyboob.com.  Terry is a hero, speaking out to educate others on this silent killer she has been blessed to survive.  I deeply appreciate her sharing with us, that she cares enough about us moms to risk telling us what we may not want to hear.  This article is not intended to frighten anyone, simply to help educate and share information. ~Jessica

Photo by bingeandpurge from deviantart.com

 

“You’re upsetting me”, she says and walks away….

Breast cancer, I talk about breast cancer. Especially in October (or “Pinktober” as it is sometimes called) as it is easier to strike up a conservation with a stranger due to the social focus on this disease. Today at a volunteer event to protect Galveston Bay, I asked the young woman standing near me if she had ever heard of IBC, Inflammatory Breast Cancer? She seemed a little confused at not being versed on IBC as she clearly was an educated woman savvy in women’s health issues. After a short delay, she said no, she had not heard of this type of breast cancer. I began to tell her about IBC, the cancer that is viewed as a rare but most fatal breast cancer often striking women prior to mammogram suggested age screenings. Her face tightened; unwittingly I had hit a nerve, as she told me there was a lot of breast cancer in her family. Within seconds calm washed over her face and she smiled and said, “But I will never get breast cancer!” Then I was the one at loss for words, “Why do you say that?” Her reply, “I have breastfed two children, each child over a year, so my breasts are resistance to cancer.” I sputtered for a minute…and I said, “I hate to tell you this, but I am a mom of five children, and nursed all of them at least to their first birthday, and I talk to women about IBC because I was diagnosed with this cancer the summer of 2007”.

Inflammatory Breast cancer is the most fatal of the known breast cancers and tends to hit women in younger years often prior to mammogram suggested age screening recommendations. Proper and aggressive treatment with IBC is very important and person’s presenting with IBC symptoms need to seek a diagnosis as soon as possible.

My heart was heavy after speaking to this beautiful young woman, because I think of myself as someone who encourages, gives hope and fights for education of a most aggressive cancer, which is dubbed “The Silent Killer.” As I watched her walk away, I felt like I had taken something from her, a confidence that breastfeeding was a given protector and that she could not get breast cancer, instead of my intention of giving her information that might be of benefit to her or others. All women need to be well educated on IBC, especially breastfeeding mothers. IBC is often misdiagnosed as mastitis or breast infection; the woman is given antibiotics and sent on her way. Time might heal all wounds, but with IBC time works against you and a proper and accurate diagnosis is very important. IBC is not detectable prior to a stage three, it does not present with a lump, is typically not found on a mammogram and the symptoms don’t fit what we tend to view as possible cancer threat.

 

Quick check list of symptoms of IBC

Inflammatory breast cancer symptoms may include:

• Breast swelling, which one breast is suddenly larger than the other
• Breast that feels warm to touch and may look infected
• Itching or shooting pain
• A dimpling of the breast skin that looks like an orange peel (peau d’orange)
• Thickening of the skin
• Flattened or discolored nipple
• Swelling in underarm or only on one side of neck
• Might feel lump, however lumps are not common in IBC.

It stands to reason that breastfeeding would aid in the good health of that child, as well as the mother. However it is not a magical cloak of protection from a disease that is viewed as seriously as IBC. So please from one breastfeeding mom to another, practice good breast health, read about IBC, and talk to your friends, midwives, and daughters. This conversation might be uncomfortable as it might go against what you believe to be true as to the benefits breastfeeding gives you as a woman, but we need to be willing to be uncomfortable sometimes, as knowledge is power. We need to be educated on IBC.

Resources:

www.theibcnetwork.org
Post questions to leading specialist about IBC, http://tinyurl.com/44n7xnq

 

  Terry Arnold was diagnosed with IBC in her right breast in August of 2007 after three months of    misdiagnosis. As if an IBC triple negative diagnosis was not enough of a blow, and never one to do things in a small way, she discovered her left breast had traditional cancer as well. In treatment for almost a year, Terry was blessed with so much support by family and friends that she was able to be of support to others with this disease even while still under care. Outside of being the best wife possible to her husband Calvin of 31 years and mother, mother in law and grandmother, she is focused on educating every person to learn more about IBC, its symptoms and best treatment plans. She looks forward to the day we can all remember than once, long ago, there was a disease called IBC that is now filed under an archive of past diseases because we have a cure. Hope always.
Filed Under: Article, Boobs, Breast Cancer, Breastfeeding, breastfeeding health, breasts, Featured, guest posts, Leakie to Leakie, motherhood Tagged With: , , , ,

Nipple Shields: life-saver, supply -wrecker or just another tool for nursing mothers?

August 9, 2011 by

 by Jenny Thomas, MD, MPH, IBCLC, FAAP, FABM

I confess, I didn’t know what a nipple shield was back in the day when I was still a very smart but breastfeeding “knowledge- challenged” pediatrician. I did know that whatever they were, they were bad. Very bad. “Never” use them under any circumstances. Ever.

Later, when my niece was born, in a hospital hundreds, nay thousands, or millions of miles away from me, imagine my horror as I found out that she needed a nipple shield to latch. This was bad. I didn’t know why. But it had to stop. So, as unsupportively as I could imagine (in retrospect) I told my sister to stop using that thing! I hadn’t met my niece yet, but I knew that she was less than 5 pounds soaking wet and that nipple thingy was going to ruin her chances of getting into the Ivy League.

One of my dearest friends in the world needed to use a shield when her second child was born. She asked for one when her third was born and was told “no” by the staff caring for her in the hospital. To me, it just was further proof that their use was fraught with problems.

I’m smarter now, at least I’m less breastfeeding-challenged, and I know better than to use the words “never” or “always” and to deny to a request without providing education and informed consent. And I’ve heard too many stories of success to discount the benefits of nipple shields for some mothers and babies. But the fact remains that we have no guidelines for nipple shield use. We have few studies rigorously done that show they are effective.

A nipple shield is a gadget that is placed over the nipple and areolar area. It looks sort of like a nipple (sort of), or a sombrero, but is made of plastic and there are different types. You can get them online and over the counter. The problem with them stems from studies (with flaws in the method in which they were done) that concluded that the use of the shield could decrease milk supply, were associated with more supplementation, and lead to early weaning.

That meant that if they were to be used, the dyad using them would need to be carefully followed, but many mothers were getting them and no follow up was scheduled. I’m not sure the logical result of that should be a compete ban on their use, but, well, they were highly discouraged. Of course, those studies were with older versions of the shield, and other research (with flaws in the method in which they were done) with newer versions of the shield suggested this wasn’t as a big a problem as we thought. But many of those same concerns exist. We honestly don’t know the short-term or long-term effects of nipple shield use.

Nipple shields are often given out in the nursery for “flat” nipples. My guess (no data, so definitely flawed study method) is that the nipples are puffy. And if that’s the case, this might be something to try.

They are often given out for a poor latch as a quick fix to a more complex problem, but we need to remember basics: skin to skin, baby-lead latch, biological nurturing. And asking for help from someone who is board certified in lactation, an “IBCLC.” The shield should not be a first step.

If it’s given to you because your nipples are sore, then in addition to the shield, we need somebody to fix the underlying problem and be your cheerleader and you heal and transition back to the breast. (Find a Lactation Consultant!)

So, suggestions:
If you are given a nipple shield ask why. Informed consent for any intervention means that you are given the required information, in an understandable manner that allows your voluntary participation and that helps in making a decision for a course of action. Questions you can ask to help fulfill informed consent: Why am I getting this thing? How long do I use it? How will it help? Might it hurt? What other things might I try? What type of follow up do I need?

If you are given a shield, and it works, well, cool. You need follow up by somebody who knows something about breastfeeding so we can work on the underlying issue that initially caused the need for the shield.

If you were given a shield and don’t like it, well, let’s get you some assistance and fix whatever the issue is that requires a gadget to fix it so we can go gadget-less.

Shields are meant to be temporary solutions. If you are still using it when your baby is months old, we really should be able to help you stop using it, if you want us to.

If you are given a shield, it works well, you baby is growing and you’re happy but everyone around you is like “ooooooh, those things are bad’ you have my permission to hear everything that that person says after that in the voice of Charlie Brown’s teacher (you remember that voice, or am I showing my age?)

Resources:
Baby led- breastfeeding:http://www.geddesproduction.com/breast-feeding-baby-led.php
Biological Nurturing: http://www.biologicalnurturing.com/
Skin-to-skin http://massbfc.org/providers/SkinToSkin.pdf
Find a lactation consultant: http://www.ilca.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=3432

Health professionals’ attitudes and use of nipple shields for breastfeeding women. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20524842
Nipple shields: a review of the literature. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20807104

 

 

 

Dr. Jenny Thomas, MD, MPH, IBCLC, FAAP, FABM is a general pediatrician and International Board Certified Lactation Consultant in southeastern Wisconsin. Find her sound, evidence-based and helpful advice on parenting at www.drjen4kids.com and Lakeshore Medical Breastfeeding Medicine Clinic.

Filed Under: Article, Articles from the professional experts, Breastfeeding, breasts, Featured, New article, Nipples, Relational Resource Tagged With: , , , , , , , , ,

Wrap Your Leaky Boobs in a Cloud- Bamboobies Giveaway

June 16, 2011 by

As part of our LIVE Facebook chat this week with TLB sponsor Bamboobies, Kerry Gilmartin has generously offered 3 prizes just for The Leaky Boob readers.  I love Bamboobies, of all the breast pads I’ve used, these are my favorites.  You can read my, uh… “experienced” review of them here.

The three prizes are a $16.99 discount code to the 3 winners good for a 2-pair package of either our regular ultra-thin, milk-proof bamboobies or our ultra-thick ultra-soft overnight bamboobies.

All you have to do to be entered is to comment on this post and if you feel like it, share a breastfeeding challenge you got through and how.  For a second entry, go like Bamboobies on Facebook, let them know TLB sent you and come back and leave a second comment letting me know you did so.  If you already like Bamboobies on Facebook, share them with your friends and leave a second comment letting me know.

That’s it!  Two easy ways to be entered.  This giveaway is open just for the next 24 hours as part of today’s chat.  The giveaway is open to international entries.

As always, Kerry has also generously offered an ordering code for Leakies as part of Bamboobies regular support of TLB.  Use TLB20 for 20% off at www.buybamboobies.com.  This code is always available for Leakies, use it this week and thank her for the informative and helpful chat!

Filed Under: Breastfeeding, breasts, giveaway, nursing, postpartum, Sponsor

Breastfeeding = Breastfeeding

March 30, 2011 by

“You look like a breastfeeder.”

I had just met the woman that said that to me and we were not even 10 minutes into our first conversation.  We met at a friend’s birthday party when the what-do-you-do question came up and I mentioned The Leaky Boob.  After explaining what TLB is to her “excuse me, say what?” response she surprised me with her response.  After I got over my own shock at her statement I wanted to say “why yes, of course I look like a breastfeeder, I’m a woman with a baby!”  Instead, I laughed.  Because I knew exactly what she meant.

I was offended a little bit though, in part because I didn’t think I did look like a breastfeeder at that moment.  Often I do but I was actually pretty not-breastfeeder looking that day, I thought.  I really thought my style was funky-artsy-cool.  Then it hit me, I was offended that someone thought I looked like a breastfeeder.  I mean, my hair was short and funky, I was wearing my cool cat style green glasses, blue jeans, halter top and a hoodie.  My nails were even done!  As you can see from the pic below, just a quick head shot on my phone I know, but taken on that very day, I don’t scream breastfeeder, do I?

Except for the female part.  And the breast part.  And the kids part.  And maybe The Leaky Boob part.

But I don’t want to look like a breastfeeder outside of those things.  Because it has a certain connotation in our culture.  Looking like a breastfeeder means you look weird.  Means only a certain type breastfeed. It means that as of yet breastfeeding is not so normal in our society and there is a brand that goes along with breastfeeding that is more specific than a person with breasts that can lactate and children.  Really, every single woman should look like a breastfeeder, not just one type.

I have to tell you something.  It’s not exactly easy for me to admit this and I’m afraid you’ll look at me differently but I need to get this out there:

The truth is I’m a pretty green mom.  Green as in… crunchy.  As in environmentally aware and “natural.”  As in we use cloth napkins and cloth diapers, have home births and we choose an alternative vaccination schedule.  We have almost no plastic play things and avoid most trademarked characters on clothing and toys as well.  I really, really am pretty crunchy.  But I think of myself as funky-normal, a variation of mainstream.  I can’t always afford to buy organic and I really like make up.  I haven’t recycled my glass in like 2 years because the city doesn’t pick it up and there isn’t a drop off anywhere near me and after lugging boxes of glass bottles around in my van for months I decided that I was probably wasting so much gas from the weight of the glass in my car that it totally offset recycling them- if I ever got to recycle them.  Oh, and I haven’t been to a homeopath since I had kids.  No Birkenstocks either.  There are plenty of not natural, non-organic probably bad for you products in my house, some of them we eat.  Also, I have a PILE of reusable shopping bags, I’ve even made some of them but I forget them more often than I take them with me to the store.  So I’m green but not green.  Not Kelly green, more like 1970’s linoleum avocado green and I have the glasses to prove it.

I have another confession.

While it is true that we avoid prepackaged foods and artificial colors and flavors in our foods we go to fast food a couple of times a month and my kids get candy full of crap 2-3 times a week.  Some of you are shaking your head going “tsk, tsk, she’s poisoning her kids!” and others are going “yeah so, we go out to some place like that every meal or would if I could afford it and I freaking LOVE Skittles.”  Personally, I’m with both of you.  I wasn’t allowed to have that stuff growing up and my mom made us have healthy substitutes instead.  We’d take our own piece of cake to birthday parties, adults would never give us the candy other kids got because my mother warned them not to, we’d get these sesame honey stick things my mom called “good candy” instead and the snacks we brought to play groups looked suspiciously similar to mulch.  Everyone looked at me sympathetically.  I hated being that kid.  H-A-T-E-D IT.  So I don’t make my kids be that kid.  They eat the crap candy their teacher hands out.  And in full disclosure, my lactivist self is a traitor and I even let my kids eat the Nestlé candy they get.  Shame on me, right?

I have another confession.

Most labels make me uncomfortable.  If I were to use one to describe myself someone could quickly point out how I am not that.  Every time I try to label myself I have an immediate exception ready.  So I don’t call myself an attachment parent.  But I do wear my babies, they sleep in our room, there is almost always a parent with them when they are young (me or The Piano Man and rarely sitters), and we don’t spank.  That said, I also believe in regularly leaving them for my own sanity and because I’m a better parent when I do, I like my stroller, and sometimes I pump a bottle of milk just because I feel like I’m going to have a panic attack if I have a baby on my boob one more time.  And I LIKE it that way, it works for my family.  Which by some standards means I fail attachment parenting.  By other standards it means I win at label-rejection I guess.

I have another confession.

We homeschool.  But I don’t want to.  In fact, I have such a hard time with it I almost can’t say it out loud.  It’s been a struggle for me for the last 4 years and as a homeschool graduate myself I swore I would never, ever homeschool.  NEVER.  I knew I wasn’t cut out for it even before I had kids and I still know I’m not.  If The Piano Man didn’t homeschool with me and we didn’t have some great homeschool programs there is no way we’d be making it.  Obviously I feel our reasons to homeschool are important enough to be doing it right now but it’s not going to be this way forever because I can’t wait to send my kids to school. Besides, I don’t look like a homeschooler either.  Right?

I have another confession.

I’m a lactivist but I don’t particularly love breastfeeding.  True story.  As a lactivist I have lots of thoughts about formula and formula companies.  Shocker, right?  Here’s the real shocker: I don’t think formula is poison!  gasp  Though I think there need to be better standards, higher quality ingredients and a heck of a lot better regulations, I’m never going to say formula is poison.  I also don’t think a mom bottle feeds because she’s lazy or selfish even if she claims that’s why.  Nope.  Instead I think there are much bigger, much deeper issues involved that she may not even understand but are a result of the booby traps so prevalent in our society and I don’t want any mom that doesn’t breastfeed to feel guilty about it.  Should I hand in my lactivist card now?  Should I be smacked and scolded “bad lactivist!” and denounced?

I have another confession.

I was a breastfeeding mom from the get-go even when I was decidedly not “crunchy.”  Before I recycled or used cloth diapers, I breastfed.  When we ate Hamburger Helper regularly as part of my rebellion in getting to eat whatever I wanted and I didn’t even know what MSG or Red 40 was, I breastfed.  When I had one carrier I hated, kept my baby in her bucket car seat all the time and planned on spanking to discipline, I breastfed.  When I worked full time, had a hospital birth, and bought every Winnie the Pooh decoration and toy I could find, I breastfed.  The idea that it was a “natural parenting” choice didn’t even occur to me.  These things weren’t even on my radar and I’d never even heard most of these terms.  In fact, over 12 years ago I went to a La Leche League meeting and was completely freaked out by my experience there and those “natural types.”  I didn’t co-sleep, didn’t want to garden, and couldn’t handle the idea of putting a candle in an ear to cure an ear infection.  Since I didn’t fit in I never went back.  But I did keep breastfeeding in spite of having almost no support.

Recently I’ve seen conversations that almost assume that everyone that breastfeeds is on the same page regarding every parenting choice.  Like we’re a club that talks, walks, dresses, eats and sleeps the same.  But we’re not.  The mom across the street from me breastfed her son for close to a year, pumping for him when she returned to work.  Unlike me she lets her son eat prepackaged food daily, have character toys and clothing and she has him fully vaccinated.  Like me, she does curbside recycling.  Also like me?  She loves her child more than she could begin to articulate.  I admire her, she’s an awesome mom and I’ve learned a lot from her and I hope maybe she’s learned some things from me.

Here’s the thing: the natural parenting/crunchy/hippie/green/stay-at-home-mom/work-at-home-mom/gentle-parenting/natural birthing/what-ever-you-want-to-add-here communities do not have the corner on breastfeeding.  Breastfeeding ≠ all natural parenting.  Breastfeeding ≠ attachment parenting.  Breastfeeding ≠ crunchy.  Breastfeeding ≠ a parenting style.  Breastfeeding ≠ rejecting mainstream parenting.  Aside from having lactating breasts, there are no real parenting style requirements to breastfeed.  No card to carry that you’re in danger of losing if your baby sleeps in a crib in another room.  Every woman that breastfeeds is a part of the breastfeeding mom club no matter how long she breastfed, where her baby sleeps, what she eats, how she introduces solids, where she gave birth, if she stays home or works, if she loves her stroller or has a dozen carriers, if she used a form of sleep training that involved cry-it-out or if she co-sleeps, if she vaccinates or doesn’t vaccinate, if she circumcises or is staunchly against it, if she covers when breastfeeding in public or just puts her baby to her breast, or even if she uses formula to supplement.  Other moms don’t have to agree with or like her choices but it doesn’t change the fact that if they breastfeed they are all still breastfeeding moms.  Moms that are the more natural, crunchy types are just as much mothers and breastfeeders in need of support as those that are more mainstream types or those that defy labels completely.  And vice-versa.

I worry sometimes that if breastfeeding is perceived to be a part of the complete “natural” package we will discover some push back against it completely.  What if they’re not interested in co-sleeping but are willing to breastfeed and then in the experience of looking for breastfeeding help and support they discover they are also expected to co-sleep?  Or a new mom plans on breastfeeding for the first 6 weeks, encounters some difficulty but is determined to get through it only to ask for help and get chastised for not planning to breastfeed until the child self-weans?  If it starts feeling like it has to be all or nothing as though breastfeeding is some sort of lifestyle then for some it will be easier and less intimidating to choose nothing than to choose all and fail.  Breastfeeding isn’t a move to pick up any label or style of parenting.  Being a breastfeeding mom doesn’t automatically make someone a babywearing mom, or a co-sleeping mom or a gentle parenting advocate.  Being a breastfeeding mom means she’s just that, a breastfeeding mom and whatever else she chooses to be.  You don’t have to adopt all or even any of the stereotypical aspects of “those natural types” in order to be a breastfeeding mother.  Just because I eventually did doesn’t mean it’s right for you and I can respect that and still support and encourage you.  Personally, I seek to support and empower women, families, parents and breastfeeding moms and their supporters regardless of their labels and choices in parenting styles.

It’s not that we can’t talk about these different choices, we can and should.  In fact, it is through encouraging and respectful dialogue about different choices we’ve made that others can be empowered to consider something other than what they already know.  For many, that’s probably how they even considered breastfeeding in the first place.  So let the conversation flow freely but let’s be careful that we don’t have a string of parenting style requirements to breastfeed and be willing to put aside our differences and still offer genuine support.  I hope we get to the place where you can’t pick a breastfeeding mom out of the crowd based on how she’s dressed or how she interacts with her children or what baby products she has with her.  That regardless of our other parenting and even lifestyle choices breastfeeding is just so normal that we don’t assume breastfeeding women look or act a certain way other than being a mom.  Whether she’s a fashionista like Kourtney Kardashian or a babywearing, homebirthing, Birkenstock sporting hippie or something in between several different stereotypes, a breastfeeding mom deserves to be supported regardless of her parenting approach.  Nobody has the monopoly on breastfeeding.  We can all be a part of the club and we all deserve support.  Just like no matter how we feed our babies we’re all a part of the mom club too.

_____________________________

Do you fit any labels?  Or find that you are a little of this, a little of that?  How would you describe your parenting style and does that have any influence on your breastfeeding?  Do you find that sometimes you look down on others that parent differently than you?

____________________________

By the way, I think all of this goes for any other parenting choice.  However we feed our children, our family and household rules, discipline, educational choices, and so much more, we all have one thing in common for sure: we’re parents that love our children.

Filed Under: Article, Boobs, Breastfeeding, breastfeeding humor, breasts, family, formula, guilt, humor Tagged With: , , , , ,

Need Some Support? A Mother’s Boutique Giveaway!

February 28, 2011 by

I had the opportunity to interview Judy Masucci, the owner of A Mother’s Boutique and a sponsor of The Leaky Boob.  Her heart for all mothers, particularly breastfeeding mothers and her wisdom and experience is something I’m so happy to share with my readers.

TLB: What made you decide to start your business?

Judy: The short story is “I had a baby and it changed my life.” I was a corporate executive before having my son. After he was born, I went back to work and worked and pumped for 15 months before deciding to leave my corporate job to do something that would enable to me help other new moms be successful breastfeeding – and enable me to spend more time with my son. I had a very difficult time getting started with breastfeeding and I wanted to help other new moms like me. My son was also an AVID nurser and literally nursed every hour for the first year of his life. So no matter where we went, we nursed in public because by the time we got there, it was time for him to nurse again. I started by business with great nursingwear. I lived in nursing tops when my son was a baby and they were hard to find – none of the local stores carried them and the selection on the web was small and difficult to navigate through. I wanted to develop a place where moms could find everything needed in one convenient location and I wanted it to be easy for them to figure out what they wanted without having to go to 10 different websites to find everything. So I started with clothing, then added nursing bras, breast pumps, slings, nursing pads, hands-free pumping accessories and maternity items. I started my business in April of 2007 and just opened a retail store (in addition to my online store) in April of 2010. I also blog, facebook and tweet – all to connect with moms and provide support for them in any way that I can.

TLB: How do you balance work and family?

Judy: One of the greatest things about owning your own business is that you choose how, when, where and how much you work. For the first 3 years, I operated my business out of my home. So I could literally choose when I worked – and much of it was done late at night after my son went to sleep. Now that I have a retail store, my schedule is a little bit more rigid, but my son is also in school – so that makes it easier to have a regular work schedule. I still do a lot of work at night after my son goes to bed and even during the day when he is playing quietly (I just negotiated 15 minutes of time with him to let me finish this interview- we set a timer and when it goes off, I will stop “working” and go play with him). I probably work harder now than I did in my corporate job – but I work for myself, and when, where and how I want to – and I love every minute (well – almost – there are a few things I could live without LOL).

TLB: What’s your favorite breastfeeding memory?

Judy: I nursed for a VERY long time. Longer than I ever dreamed I would and longer than many moms do – one of favorite memories is actually when my son was older. One he was in a toddler bed (approximately age 2 – 2.5), he would wake up in the morning and come into my bed to nurse. We would nurse, snuggle and both fall back to sleep. It was my absolute favorite time of the day. It was loving, warm and there’s nothing better than falling asleep with a little babe in your arms. Ironically, as he got a bit older and started dropping nursing sessions – this was one of the first to go. I always thought it would be the last – but he would wake up and want to go play with his toys – sometime he wouldn’t even come get me, I would wake up and he would already be downstairs playing. I missed that nursing session most of all.

TLB: How would you encourage someone preparing to breastfeed for the first time?

Judy: I think the things I would say to the mom would differ based on if she was eager to breastfeed or if she was on the fence. I always encourage moms to read books on breastfeeding and to take a class – and most of all – to stick with it. If you get through the first 2 weeks or so (which for some of us can be a difficult two weeks), the rest of it is “easy sailing” and you will be so glad that you stuck with it. I think it is important for moms to know that it “might be hard” at first – because that way they know what to expect and they can prepare themselves and make it through. So many moms who don’t know what to expect think that they must have been doing something wrong and give up – all because no one told them that it might be hard at first. So I wouldn’t say anything to scare them away, but I also don’t hide the truth. One of my favorite articles to give to new moms is by Diane Wiessinger, and it’s called “What if I Want to Wean My Baby?” It walks you thorugh all of the benefits your baby (and you) get from breastfeeding – no matter how short or how long you do it for. I have given this article to moms who were on the fence and didn’t know if they wanted to breastfeed – and it helped them to give it a try – and I have given this article to moms had to stop breastfeeding sooner than they wanted to – and it helped them to see what a wonderful gift they have given their baby – even if they didn’t breastfeed for as long as they would have liked. I think it is an article that every mom and mom-to-be should read.

Nursing bras: ever wonder what size nursing bra should I wear? Judy’s here to help you find out and win one too!

Did you know that 70% of women are wearing the wrong size bra? And I bet that percentage is even higher amongst nursing moms. When you get pregnant and have a baby your body changes in ways that you could never have imagined. And for many of us – one of the biggest changes (besides the little life form growing in our bellies) is the changes that happen to our breasts! On average, most women will go up 1-2 cup sizes from their pre-pregnancy size to their breastfeeding size. But this is an average and the spectrum ranges from no changes to WOWZA – I didn’t know bras came that large! I have a friend who started out as a 34C and ended up a 34J – yes, that is “J” as in JUGS! She was a size small but had to wear size large shirts just to accommodate her bust.

Luckily, most of us won’t change that much – but any changes mean a new bra is needed. And since most of us started out wearing a bra that probably wasn’t the correct size, figuring out what our new size should be can be very challenging. Lucky for us, there are moms our there who want to help.  Judy from A Mother’s Boutique is one of those moms.  She specializes in helping moms find great bras and you can see from all of the testimonials on her website -that she does a great job at it. Whether you meet her in person or virtually via phone or email – Judy will be able to find you a great bra
that is perfect for YOU.

First things first – in order to get a great bra, you need to know your measurements. If you can get a professional bra fitting – that is ideal -but if you aren’t nearby a place that can properly measure you, just follow these simple instructions from Judy’s blog, Mommy News and Views, and you will be ready to go.

Now that you know what size you are, you need to pick out a bra that is right for you. And the difficulty here is that every bra runs differently -so even though you have measured yourself and know your size, you need to know something about the bras you are interested in to know if you need to go larger or smaller based on how it runs. For instance – some bras are sized S,M,L,XL instead of particular cups sizes – so you need to look at the sizing chart to see what size you will need. Other bras may “say” they are a 36D, but they really fit someone who is a 38D. Then there are the bras that have European sizing instead of US sizing – for those, you need a translator, because while a DD cup in European sizing is the same as a DD cup in US-sizing, an H in European is really a K in US – so having a conversion key to lead you through is crucial.

So once you figure out your size and find some bras that you like, you now need to know how bra sizing works – because it isn’t always as straight forward as one might think (or hope). A 34C and a 36B have the same “cup size” even though they have different letters – this can be very confusing when trying to get a bra that fits. If you try one one bra and it is too snug in the band, but fits in the cup, most women will just get the next band size up and keep the cup the same. But now this bra will fit in the band, but cup will be too large. If your 34C is too snug, but fits in the cup – you need to get the 36B, not the 36C. If only bra sizing were simpler – moms wouldn’t have so much trouble finding a bra that fits.  When you are shopping online – this is key because you don’t want to spend all of your time and money shipping things back and forth.

Believe it or not – it is possible to get a great fitting nursing bra even if you don’t live close to a shop that sells them. And Judy, from A Mother’s Boutique is here today to help out FIVE lucky moms!! Of course, she’ll help all of you if need or want help – but FIVE of you will get a personalized bra fitting and free bra* of your choice!
Winner #1 will get a free nursing bra (up to a $55 value)
Winner #2 will get a free nursing bra (up to a $30 value)
Winner #3 will get a free nursing bra (up to a $25 value)
Winner #4 will get a $15 gift certificate to be redeemed toward any nursing bra of your choice
Winner #5 will get a $15 gift certificate to be redeemed toward any nursing bra of your choice.

A Mother’s Boutique carries nursing bras ranging in size from 32-48 A-K and ranging in price from $14 up to $55. So there is something for every mom and something for every budget.

To enter to win one of these bras, please leave a comment below telling us why you need a new bra and which one you think would choose from A Mother’s Boutique if you win. This entry is REQUIRED in order to be chosen for a prize.

You can get a 2nd chance to win by stopping by and visiting A Mother’s Boutique on facebook. Her facebook pages is great source of interactive information and she has even hired a Certified Lactation Counselor to post information and answer questions from moms – so stop by, like her page and say “hi” – then be sure to come back here and leave a 2nd comment telling us that you did it. This entry is optional and will give you an EXTRA chance to win one of these great nursing bras.

That’s it – two simple tasks and FIVE lucky mamas are on their way to winning a great nursing bra along with a customized fitting!  Thanks to Judy for her generous giveaway, providing support for breastfeeding moms everywhere.  With 5 prizes, be sure to share this giveaway, an easy way for you to support other breastfeeding moms as well.  This giveaway will remain open until March 7th, 2010.  Good luck and have fun!

___________________________________________________________________

This giveaway is now closed.  Good luck to everyone that entered, winners will be drawn through a random drawing using random.org.

Congratulations to our lucky winners!

Prize 1: comment 457 Larissa Brunken
Prize 2: comment 116 RaShes
Prize 3: comment 311 Katie Langan
Prize 4: comment 182 Rachel T
Prize 5: comment 68 Pocklock

Thank you Judy for this wonderful opportunity!

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Filed Under: Breastfeeding, breastfeeding help, breastfeeding stories, breasts, extended breastfeeding, giveaway

Breastfeeding, My Daughters, and Body Image

January 27, 2011 by

I breastfeed for my daughters. At first glance, this would seem obvious: I have all girls. We all breastfeed or formula feed our children for them, it is what you do as a parent; feed your child.  And this is of course true for me as well.  After all, breastfeeding is the biological normal way to feed a human baby and thankfully my body can do it just fine.  But over time a new aspect of breastfeeding has emerged for me.  I don’t breastfeed only to feed and bond with my daughters any more.  In this age where an impossible ideal is held up as desirable for the female form, when airbrushing celebrity figures to make them “perfect” is the accepted norm, when a woman’s worth is presented as being entirely wrapped up in her sex appeal, when women’s (and men’s) bodies are used to sell things, when objectifying a human being for their body is lucrative, one of the reasons I openly breastfeed my babies is so my daughters can see something different. Initially this benefit of breastfeeding wasn’t on my radar. I was focused, like most new moms, on doing what was best for my baby and “breast is best.” (My views on that saying and it’s impact on breastfeeding have changed after all these years.) Attractive qualities of breastfeeding such as statistically higher IQ levels in breastfed babies, lower risk of obesity in adulthood, super-power like immune system boosting, and faster/better recovery time after birth all sounded good to me and I was drawn in by these dreamy sounding sale pitches that no other product could truly replicate.  I felt my daughters deserved the best and I would do everything in my power to give them the very best I could.  Though not impressed with myself for breastfeeding my daughters, I was pleased, even if I didn’t really think about it too much with my first three girls.  It was just simply something you do as a mother: push baby out, expel placenta, breasts get the signal to produce milk, put baby to breast, and the rest, as they say, is history. It changed though.  While I knew the wonders of breastfeeding I began to see myself and the world a little differently as I watched my girls grow.  Earlier than I ever imagined possible it seemed little girls were encouraged to flaunt their sexuality with clothing options that seemed better suited for “girls” about 4 times their age and no, I’m not joking.  Advertising, toys and cartoon characters jumped out at me suddenly as more messages to little girls (and boys) as to what a woman was supposed to look like and what her purpose was.  Suddenly even my favorite Disney princess from my own childhood concerned me as I considered the sexual overtones of her character and clothing.  I wanted something different for my daughters and I found myself becoming increasingly concerned with the messages my young girls were hearing regarding their bodies and what they should look like.  The messages they were hearing of their purpose and function. Of their worth and value. When Squiggle Bug was born nearly 5 years after Lolie, my 3rd, my girls were fascinated with my changing body during the pregnancy.  They loved the midwife visits and The Piano Man and I considered having them present for the birth.  To prepare them for that we started watching birth videos with them.  Long an open family about bodies, the differences between boys and girls and openly educating about sex, we encouraged them to ask questions.  Watching them watch a baby being born in these videos was beautiful, they were in awe of the whole process and I was reminded of the wonder of birth.  Seeing them take in breastfeeding and learn how it works, I marveled in a way I never had before over the incredible design.  Then a conversation with The Storyteller caused me to marvel in my own body when she said “You can do that?  You did that for us?  That’s amazing!  Mommy, your body is awesome!” I had never, ever in my entire life seen my body as awesome. I have not been good friends with my body.  Unfortunately, much like other women, I have struggled with body image.  In my head I can acknowledge beauty that wouldn’t be considered magazine worthy and I love and applaud representations that fly in the face of western societies expectations of what is desirable.  Yet for myself I hold a different standard.  Growing up I saw beauty defining images that depicted something pinched, poked, pushed, and painted.  And I liked it, wanted to look like that.  Complicating it further was my family’s very conservative faith views of modesty and during the very formative years of puberty I was bombarded with messages that if I dressed a certain way I would be responsible for making men and boys lust… or worse.  As I got older I heard people imply that if a woman was raped to look at how she was dressed, she was probably “asking” for it.  I always felt that any unwanted attention on my body was my own fault.  I wasn’t even sure if my body was something I really had any say over.  The struggle the conflicting messages I received contributed to me being insecure and I was afraid of my own body.  Should I hide it?  Should I flaunt it?  Would it cause my guy friends to stumble?  Or would it make me popular and admired?  Whatever it was, it wasn’t good.  Either way my body wasn’t good enough, beautiful enough, sexy enough, big enough, small enough, soft enough, hard enough, safe enough, innocent enough, protected enough, modest enough, pure enough, it would never be enough.  My body failed everything, every standard set.  And I didn’t know how but I felt it was all my own fault. These feelings impacted my relationships including my relationship with my husband and my children.  I struggled with pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding in part due to these feelings.  Breastfeeding Earth Baby, my first, was no walk in the park for me emotionally. With time though I started to feel like maybe it wasn’t my body that failed, maybe it was society that had failed me though I wasn’t sure how.  Childbearing and breastfeeding did give me some respect for my body while at the same time confusing me further as to how motherhood could be so beautiful but drive being beautiful even further out of my reach.  Pushing back wasn’t easy and to this day I still struggle with internal voices telling me I’m still not enough.  With my daughters though the failure was glaring.  How I was failed was muddied by my own destructive behaviors but how my daughters were failed was unfolding before my eyes.  Surrounded by images, stories and marketing aimed to sell them something my daughters were drawn to artificial depictions of beauty just as I was.  I knew this wasn’t what I wanted for them.  We could have fun with dress up, make up and doing the pretty thing for ourselves but I didn’t want them to become consumed with aspiring to some artificial standard they could spend all the money in the world to reach and still fall short.  Early on we started rejecting toys and entertainment options that glorified a version of the female form that nobody really has any hope of reaching and choose selectively options that featured more realistic or simple characters.  We chose to be a Barbie-free home, the Disney princesses were regulated to a minor role, Saturday morning cartoons are a rarity and I stopped reading fashion magazines.  Still, I couldn’t help but notice that the girls were intrigued by this image of false female perfection. So we talked.  A lot and often.  Sometimes serious, sometimes casual, always open.  In the course of dialoguing with them I began to realize something: if I wanted this for them I had to want it for me. Getting rid of the fashion magazines was one of the best things I ever did for both my daughters and myself.  Learning to love and accept my body on an ongoing basis, embracing the struggle of my conflicting feelings is part of empowering them.  Letting them see me use my body for feeding their little sister and my choice to do so without shame and without covering in public, to embrace my body as it functioned naturally instead of imposing an unnatural standard of beauty or being controlled by fear helped them to accept their bodies now and as they grow and change in the future.  It also helped me.  Their questions, fascination and awe at the amazing things my body could do humbled me to tears.  They appreciated something I had never had the courage to truly see.  Today my older three daughters think breastfeeding is great and will easily say as much without blushing or giggling, just honest enthusiasm for something so magically normal.  My daughters are clearly comfortable around breasts and breastfeeding, which is good since, you know, they’ll probably have both some day.  I want them to appreciate and value their body both then and now. It is my honest hope that my older girls will remember me breastfeeding and these memories will be a part of empowering them to accept their bodies, to be fascinated and enjoy the power of their bodies and to embrace a much fuller and honest definition of beauty and their growing sexuality.  For my younger girls I hope that we continue to have friends that breastfeed their babies so my daughters will see and ask questions like their big sisters did, developing the same awe and confidence in the female body, including their own.  From this place they stand a greater chance of a healthy body image, generating confidence and self respect.  I’m still working on this for myself and I won’t stop because I’m not only doing it for me, I’m doing it for my daughters.  For me I am learning that my body, indeed my whole self is more complex than advertisers and parts of society would have me believe.  And I’m claiming it back.  For me.  For my daughters.  For women everywhere. As Earth Baby grows into her body as a young woman we have more and more frequent conversations about breasts and I love seeing her views develop.  Many times our conversations happen while I’m breastfeeding Smunchie and as she expresses her thoughts and concerns, voicing her questions that are both practical and philosophical, I marvel at the beauty of this moment.  Normal.  Healthy.  Beautiful.  I am breastfeeding for my daughters. (Photograph by Jack Potts, Bohemian Photography)

Filed Under: Article, body image, Boobs, Breastfeeding, breasts, Children and breastfeeding, Featured, motherhood, nursing

It’s Time for Facebook to Prove It’s Not Anti-Women

January 5, 2011 by

The Leaky B@@b Facebook page was reinstated again this afternoon, January 5, 2011.  This time cautious celebrations were expressed on the page along with fear that it would just go back down.  As I write this it has been up for 7 hours, just about as long as it was up yesterday.  Hopefully it will really stay this time.

Our celebration is tempered a bit though, we’re missing a few of our members.  Several “Leakies” as we affectionately call those on the Facebook page, had their accounts disabled after receiving warnings for supposed obscene photos.  Just like TLB, they received the non-specific form letter via email informing them that they were deleted for violating the TOS. These individuals along with numerous other group and business pages have had their accounts deactivated all because someone decided that their breastfeeding photo or information was vulgar.

Judy P. Masucci, Ph.D, president and owner of A Mother’s Boutique shares how Facebook deactivating her account last summer impacted her.  Now she tip-toes around her pages on Facebook afraid to say or post anything that may attract unwanted attention.  What is she doing that is so obscene?  Sharing information and photos that support breastfeeding and mothering.  No lewd photos, no hateful content and certainly nothing as revealing as what you can find on the Playboy Facebook page.  (I can’t bring myself to link to the Playboy page but if you’re really curious do a Facebook search, you’ll see what I mean.)

As excited as we are to have The Leaky B@@b back, the problem remains and any page, individual, or photo is at risk of being deleted when related to breast health.  Facebook has a responsibility to it’s customers to clearly communicate that they are pro-women by creating a new way to moderate materials flagged as obscene.  No doubt the company is overwhelmed with reports of obscenity but surely they are smart enough to develop a system that would allow them to remove the truly obscene materials while those related to breast health including breastfeeding and breast cancer are able to remain.  Additionally they need to have a provision for an exempt status for all groups, pages, and companies related to breast health.  If they don’t, well entrepreneurs, there’s a market here for you to create a new social media site that can do just that.  Facebook, your customers are unhappy and many of us are waiting to see what you decide to do now before we take our business elsewhere.  I appreciate your efforts to keep pornographic images off Facebook, I really do but please, breastfeeding is not pornographic.  Reinstating The Leaky B@@b indicates that you are aware there is a significant problem with your current mode of operation.  The first media coverage I could find on this problem dates back to 2007.  You would think Facebook would get tired of this and make some necessary changes.  Four years is long enough, fix it.

Have you had your account deactivated and you suspect it is for breastfeeding photos?  If you or someone you know of, individual or group, has had their account or page deactivated please leave the information in the comments here.  If there is a page started to bring them back (as was Bring Back The Leaky Boob- again.) please share the link to that as well.  I am compiling a list to take to Facebook not only to ask for those pages and individuals to be reinstated but to show how flawed their current system is.  If The Leaky B@@b could be deleted twice within a matter of days something is obviously not working.

Nobody should have to tip-toe around their pages afraid that educating and supporting breastfeeding or breast health could have them deleted.  Help us continue to hold Facebook accountable to it’s customers.

Filed Under: Article, Boobs, Breastfeeding, breastfeeding health, breasts, Facebook, The Leaky Boob Tagged With: , , , ,

Press Release

January 4, 2011 by

If you would like to share this, please use this link to the press release or share this post.  Thank you.

BREASTFEEDING SUPPORT GROUPS ASKS FACEBOOK TO STOP CALLING BREASTS OBSCENE

01.04.2011– Houston, TX – The Leaky Boob (http://leakyboob.blogspot.com), a breastfeeding support site for parents, is asking Facebook to reconsider their obscenity and vulgarity position on the word “breast” after having “The Leaky B@@b” fan page removed from Facebook for obscenity. “There is nothing obscene or vulgar about breastfeeding,” said Jessica Martin-Weber, founder and editor of The Leaky Boob. “With all the positive attention for breast cancer awareness and prevention, and the vital importance of breastfeeding, it seems staggering to me that I’m asking Facebook to do this in 2011.”

Martin-Weber’s Facebook fan page was taken down Sunday, but Facebook has been typically silent about any particulars. Martin-Weber has gotten only a form letter saying that the page violated Facebook’s terms of service, and hinting at vulgar and obscene content. “It’s ridiculous that breastfeeding is confused with anything vulgar and obscene,” says Martin-Weber. “Especially when there are so many truly obscene or vulgar pages with thousands of followers currently on Facebook.”

Martin-Weber says she understands and approves of Facebook’s stance on obscene content, and she’s fully in support of that position. “I have children and they will use Facebook when they are old enough. I don’t want to see pornographic content when I’m using it now,” she explains. “But it’s time for Facebook to give sites that mention the word “breast” for health and wellness reasons a way to be exempt from the obscenity filter.”

Martin-Weber says she decided to go public with the situation, and publicly appeal to Facebook to support breast health because of the thousands of women who are helped by the page every month. “We get an average of 16,000 impressions on our posts, and reading the posts on our wall from women with urgent questions has committed me to find a way to provide real-time support in a safe atmosphere.”

“I want to be clear that this issue is not only about breastfeeding,” adds Martin-Weber. “There are a number of breast cancer prevention sites that have similar word usage and are in danger of also being considered obscene by Facebook. This is an issue about breast health and wellness, and Facebook needs to provide a way for pages who deal with these issues to be approved. Facebook needs to stop treating breastfeeding and breast health related terminology, images and pages just as they would obscene materials. There is a significant difference.”

“Many women don’t have other resources if they have a question in the middle of the night, or don’t know where else to go for referrals to help in their local area,” Martin-Weber explains. “The Leaky B@@b fan page provided that, and Facebook was wrong to take it down. Thousands of women lost their support community when our page was removed.”

Martin-Weber is asking supporters to respectfully and clearly let Facebook know how they feel, either by posting on Mark Zuckerburg’s fan page, blogging and posting about the issue, emailing Facebook or asking their local media to cover the issue. “Facebook has done this many times in the past, and they have reinstated pages at times. This isn’t over.”

Martin-Weber is available for media interviews and additional information. Contact Sheri Wallace, Organic PR, sheri@organicprpro.com.

Filed Under: Article, body image, Boobs, Breastfeeding, breastfeeding health, breastfeeding help, breasts, Facebook

If These Boobs Could Talk- More Than Fun Bags

November 16, 2010 by

I have finally found and understood my purpose in life.  Most people never get that and yet, I have.  And I’m just a pair of boobs.

B@@bies.  Jugs.  Fun Bags.  Hooters.  Tits.  Ta-tas.  Knockers.  Rack.  Bazongas.  I’ve got a lot of names, a lot of incarnations, and a whole lot of varieties.  Breasts, no matter what you call me, pretty much every woman has me front and at least sort of center on her chest. Perky, droopy, apples, melons, socks with rocks, long, full, short, floppy and everything in between, I’ve been bouncing along for as long as humans have traipsed around this planet.  Which is a long time.  But every woman has to figure out what to do with me at one point or another and it isn’t always easy.  It has been vogue at various times of history to leave me free and unfettered under clothing, to push me up and out, to bind me tight and flat, to pierce me, paint me, hide me and flaunt me.  In some cultures I’m always out and open, others I’m so revered I’m covered yet a peek is desperately sought so much so there are men that will even pay money for it.

Before they have their own pair, every little girl at least notices that the adult version of herself has some sort of extra padding on her chest, something her male counterparts do not have.  These chest pillows are fascinating and in today’s western cultures a bit of an obsession.  As little girls grow they start experimenting with what they’d look like with soft round growths on their chest.  I am the mark of woman.  Not alone in that responsibility, I share the distinction of being uniquely feminine with the female pelvis and vagina.  With the exception of man-boobs.  But for everyone’s comfort, we’ll pretend those don’t exist, anywhere.  Ever.  Before I begin to develop on immature females, they play that I am there just because it is synonymous with playing a grown-up.

Then they sprout their own pair, slowly or quickly breasts eventually appear.  Confusing feelings mingle with my advent on a changing girl’s chest.  Pride and excitement about becoming a woman collide with embarrassment and a desire to stay a care-free child.  Eventually she learns that in western cultures breasts equal a certain kind of power, one she may not be comfortable wielding or one that is wielded against her.  Her breasts may feel like a burden regardless of their size or like a defining part of her personhood that she can use to her advantage.

As for me, I was just an average pair of smallish boobs, situated on a small framed woman that often wished I was bigger.  To make matters worse, one of my nipples was a split nipple, malformed and strange looking.  Her dissatisfaction with my size and shape led to uncomfortable bras to pad me out and push me up and I endured criticism every time she looked at me in a mirror.  No matter what I did, what I wore or how I participated in lovemaking, fashion and life she was unhappy with me.  She never knew what to do with me and I never knew what to do with myself.  I was inadequate.

Until one day.  There had been change, I had grown recently but she still wasn’t satisfied, now I managed to be too big or too… something.  No matter what I wasn’t good enough.  My bigger size included painful growing and she was distracted by other physical changes that were apparently far more important than me, the neglected, the unloved ones.  That is until that day.  The uterus and vagina, in one of their greatest moments of achievement produced a baby.  As the placenta left the uterus I got a signal, one that changed me forever: feed baby now.  I had already been producing a golden yellow liquid for which I saw no purpose and caused her even further disgust in me but when that baby came out and was placed on the belly, I knew.  Arms drew this small person close and the baby’s mouth immediately began searching for something: me.


In no time it became clear that I was this baby’s favorite thing in the world.  Every chance she got she latched on to me.  She loved me.  She didn’t care if I was perky or sagging, smooth skinned or flecked with red stretch marks, if I had large or tiny nipples, or even that one nipple wasn’t quite right.  She had a special sign for me, and that was the first sign she ever used.  It took us some time, the 2 or really 3 of us, but it was really just getting used to each other and figuring out how this works.  There were some rough moments, a few tears and frustrated words but we got it, we worked it out.  We had to.  Because this was what we were made for.

Now I have a position of respect and I am celebrated.  Five babies now have been nourished by me, have searched for me in their sleep, patted me as they suckled and asked for me by their special name.  I have comforted a small one hundreds of times over when nothing else would do.  Through me has flowed the healing power of sweet milk custom made for the baby whose mouth opened expectantly.  Small cheeks have rested on me in slumber after I have satiated their hunger and their need to be warm and close.  When I am seen in the mirror I am viewed sometimes critically but always with appreciation and I am treated tenderly.  My purpose is clear, everything else I do is nice and I enjoy a full and active life but nothing has fulfilled me as much as feeding a baby. 

Some day this job will be done and I will no longer feed babies.  I am ok with this; for when one finds and understands their purpose and the time in which it is served, one can accept when that time is over, satisfied in having discovered and served a purpose at all.  Knowing that I was more than an inadequate pair of fun bags and meant the world to 5 little girls is enough for me.

Not every pair of breasts will find their purpose the same way I did but I hope more and more do.  It doesn’t matter what you call me, what I’m dressed in, what society says I’m supposed to look like or what my role is, I’m happy.  I have been appreciated, loved and enjoyed for who I really am.

P.S. I love this video.

Filed Under: adoptive breastfeeding, body image, Boobs, breasts

Mexican-American B@@bies

August 2, 2010 by

For our WBW blog carnival on “Perspectives: Breastfeeding From Every Angle” we are pleased to host guest posts from various contributors. Today we are honored to share from Martha, Mexican-American mother working in the US and breastfeeding her daughter.

I am a Mexican-American. My parents are both from Mexico and came to the US before I was born. I was born state-side. My entire life has been a struggle between two cultures. Growing up I wanted to be just an American. I didn’t deny my Mexican heritage but being a Mexican wasn’t my top priority. I think I always felt like I didn’t belong anywhere. I’m never Mexican enough, never American enough.

Then I had my daughter. Audrey has been the piece that made me feel whole. I don’t have to belong to anyone but her. Breastfeeding has been an integral part of that journey. Knowing that Audrey’s well-being was based on me finally made me rearlize that no one else’s thoughts about me and my background mattered. Audrey is number one in my life.

Growing up breastfeeding was just a normal part of life. Boobs were for babies. Who had money for formula? If you had to give a bottle, it had regular cow’s milk, not formula. To me, breastfeeding was just normal so there was never a question in my mind that I would breastfeed.

Though I have to admit, I did buy into the whole American bottle thing. I had just about bought the whole American birth/baby thing. You have to buy stuff to raise a kid, right? If you don’t spend the money, your child will be weird. I almost fell for it and then my midwife said “All you need for the baby is a blanket, a diaper and pair of boobs.” A light went off. I don’t need anything else but my breast in order to raise my baby. You can successfully raise a child with just your boobs!

I knew from the start that I would be returning to work after 6-weeks so I was going to have to bottle feed once I returned to work. I was worried that working full-time and breastfeeding were not going to work together. I didn’t know anyone that had done it. All the women I had known that breastfed were stay-at-home-moms. I had never heard of pumping! I took a breastfeeding class and that helped put my mind at ease that I could do it. I could work full-time and breastfeed. Maybe it wasn’t what I was used to, but I could do it. A true melding of the Mexican and American me.

It hasn’t always been easy. At week 5, just as I was sure I could do this. Just as I was getting comfortable with the whole operation, I got thrush. Honestly, it hurt worse than labor. I was sure my breastfeeding days were over. Thankfully my doctor gave me a prescription and encouraged me to continue. After that, the transition back to work went smoothly. Audrey refuses to take a bottle unless she is really hungry, which means a surplus of milk in the freezer. But otherwise, thankfully, we are going strong even after 7 months.

I’ve learned that my life isn’t about being Mexican or American; it’s about being me and being the best mother I can be. For me, breastfeeding has been a huge part of me growing into a woman. I’m not a little girl playing dress up, I’m a wife and mother. My body has had a part in creating life and continues to nurture that life. It took my breast living up to their potential to help me see myself as a whole person.

Filed Under: Breastfeeding, breastfeeding stories, breastpump, breasts, World Breastfeeding Week
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